This past weekend, my daughter Emma competed at the World Equestrian Center in Wilmington, Ohio, and to say she crushed it would be an understatement. She took 1st place in the $10,000 1.35m Welcome and 2nd place in the $10,000 1.30m Futures Prix. Watching her ride—piloting a massive animal over jumps taller than most of us—never stops being both thrilling and slightly terrifying.

Her mother and I couldn’t be prouder, but let’s be honest: being a horse show parent isn’t for the faint of heart. It requires endurance, patience, and a strong back (for all the standing, sitting, and hauling gear). It’s an all-day event, and over the years, I’ve learned a few things about how to survive—and maybe even enjoy—it.

So, for all the parents out there, here’s my guide to getting through a full day at a horse show like a pro.

Step 1: Holding the Horse (Or, The Moment You Realize You’re Not in Charge)

One of my biggest responsibilities as a horse show dad is holding Vinny, Emma’s horse, while she walks the course with her trainer. Now, Vinny is big. Like, really big. He’s friendly, sure, but let’s be real—at any moment, he could decide that I’m just a mildly annoying inconvenience standing between him and a snack.

Standing there, holding onto this 1,200-pound animal, it always hits me just how impressive Emma is. Not only does she ride him, but she controls him. She asks him to jump enormous fences, maneuver tight turns, and push for speed—all while staying completely balanced and in sync. Meanwhile, I’m standing in the schooling ring just hoping he doesn’t decide to test my lack of horse-handling skills.

Pro tip: If you ever find yourself holding a horse at a show, act confident. They can sense fear. Also, don’t stand too close—Vinny once sneezed on me, and I’m still not over it.

Step 2: The Warm-Up Ring – Where Stress Levels Peak

The warm-up ring is controlled chaos. Riders are weaving in and out, jumps are getting adjusted, trainers are shouting last-minute instructions, and there I am—watching, pacing, and trying not to make any noise that will get me glared at.

Key Dad Survival Tips:

• Stay out of the way. Trust me, the warm-up ring is no place for aimless wandering.

• Don’t try to “help.” Your equestrian has a trainer, and they do not need your sage wisdom about “just jumping higher.”

• Be careful what you say. Which brings me to…

Step 3: The Show Ring – The Longest Three Minutes of Your Life

Emma enters the ring. I stop breathing.

For the next 90 seconds, I am completely useless. Every jump feels impossibly high. Every stride looks either too fast or too slow. Every turn seems tighter than it should be. And then—before I even process it—she’s through the finish timers, and we’re waiting for the results.

Now, here’s where a critical dad duty comes in: recording the round. One of us—me or her mom—always has the job of filming Emma’s ride.

This means:

1. You can’t panic audibly.

2. You can’t react too soon.

3. You absolutely cannot say something dumb, because it will be on the open mic for eternity.

Some classic mistakes I’ve made:

❌ “Oh man, that looked too close—wait, is that supposed to happen?”

❌ “Did she just miss that turn?” (Spoiler: She did not.)

❌ “I should’ve gotten a snack before this.”

Nothing like having your clueless commentary played back in slow motion while your daughter critiques her ride.

Step 4: Post-Ride Protocol – Food, Reassurance, and Tactical Silence

Once the ride is over, the real challenge begins: dealing with my stressed-out daughter.

Now, Emma is 18. She’s technically an adult. But in these moments—whether she wins, places second, or has a round she’s unhappy with—she’s still my kid. And my job as a dad is to read the situation and respond accordingly.

Post-ride rules of engagement:

✔️ If she wins? Celebrate, but not too much. (She wants to be cool about it.)

✔️ If she’s frustrated? Don’t offer advice. Just nod and say, “I get it.” Even though I don’t.

✔️ If she’s hungry? Drop everything and find food. Immediately.

And of course, no matter what happens, I can always count on Emma reminding me how little I actually know about this sport. Despite years of watching, traveling, and learning horse lingo, she’ll still hit me with:

• “Dad, you don’t even know what a rollback turn is.”

• “That was not a ‘big jump.’ That was literally the smallest fence on course.”

• “You wouldn’t last five minutes riding Vinny.”

She’s probably right.

Final Thoughts: Why We Do It

At the end of the day, spending 10+ hours at a horse show is exhausting. My back hurts. My legs are stiff. I have so many videos of riders that aren’t even my kid, because I started recording too early. But I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Because when Emma walks out of that ring—whether she’s holding a blue ribbon or just happy with how she rode—I know she sees us there. And that’s what matters.

So to all the parents out there perfecting the art of sitting—stay strong, stay caffeinated, and always double-check that you’re actually filming the right horse.

See you at the next one.

Photo credit:  Winslow Photography. winslowphoto.com

#ManelineLife #BarnDadChronicles #HorseShowSurvivalGuide #winslowphoto